So here's what i do when i'm bored at work...
I came up with my all-star lineup of modern rock. They will be known as the Ampersands, what my band was once known as (terrible i know), and they will play a once in a lifetime tour that hits New York, L.A., London, Sydney and Saskatoon.
Ladies and gentlemen, the ampersands are:
Drums - Jet's Nic Cester.
He's a greasy bastard, with a scruffy beard, open shirt and always wearing that captain's hat. He's also got a great drumming style. Lots of big fills, changes between steady and big slamming hrythms. I love his sound, but not as much as i his look. Plus, he's an Aussie, so that doesn't hurt.
Bass - the Bees' Aaron Fletcher.
Bass is usually not a flashy instrument, and in this day and age, there isn't anyone doing much to change that fact. Fletcher's bass lines are simple and effective, taking cues from beatlesesque McCartney work. His real strength, aside from his great lyric writing, lies in his ability to be anonymous, not saying much, but contributing to the rhythmic solidarity of the bees.
Rhythm Guitar - the Bees' Paul Butler.
2 bees, i know, but how could i leave Butler out? He's a fine rhythm player, but he's here for that voice. Perfectly suited to screaming anthemic rock songs and crooning sweet love ballads alike.
Lead Guitar - the White Stripes' Jack White.
He knows a thing or two about playing lead, he does all the work in his own band, so hopefully Jack can sit back and enjoy himself abit in the Ampersands.
Keyboards - the Killers' Brandon Flowers.
Representing the more pouty/80s side of rock, Flowers gives the band the much needed dose of arrogance. He'll be the vocal leader when it comes time for interviews and will provide much needed keyboard work.
Lead Vocals - the Thrills' Conor Deasy.
The sappy voiced irishman will front the Ampersands. His emotive vocals will rise to new heights backed by the allstar group. Plus, he brings a little tenderness to contrast with Jack White's harsh vocals and Brandon Flower's snobby sneerings.
So that's the lineup. Here's their setlist. Each band represented in the Ampersands gets 2 songs (the bees get 3, cause they have 2 members), but only 1 of the songs can be sung by the member of that band. So here's the songs, the order, and who's singing what:
1) Last Chance
(Jet) - sung by Paul Butler.
Obviously Nic Cester isn't going to sing, but Butler should sound good ripping into this raucous opener.
2) Mr. Brightside
(the Killers) - sung by Brandon Flowers.
Couldn't imagine anyone but Flowers doing this one.
3) Big Sur
(the Thrills) - sung by Conor Deasy.
Same as above. Only Deasy can plead "Just don't go back to big sur" just right.
4) Rollover DJ
(Jet) - sung by Jack White
Classic rock feel and Jack White's voice should go well together.
5) Smile Like You Mean It
(Killers) - sung by Conor Deasy.
This song gets even creepier than it already is with Deasy's whispful singing.
6) You're Pretty Good Looking For A Girl
(White Stripes) - sung by Brandon Flowers.
Flowers brings some weird connotations to this one, while the band livens up the sparsely arranged original.
7) Black Math
(White Stripes) - sung by Jack White.
White rips into this one like only he can. Flowers adds a bizarre synth interlude.
8) Don't Steal Our Sun
(the Thrils) - sung by Paul Butler.
Butler does the Thrills service, taking vocal duties over from Deasy. Deasy, White and Fletcher provide the Byrds style harmonies.
9) I Love You
(the Bees) - sung by Deasy.
Deasy makes the girls cry with his sensitive rendition of this one. Butler and Fletcher play horns and do the 'love you...' harmonies.
10) Wash in the rain
(the Bees) - sung by Paul Butler
Butler leads the crew in a rousing rendition of wash in the rain. Deasy and Flowers play marakas and everybody sings on the chorus.
Tumbling Dice (Rolling Stones) - everyone sings together on this drunken-sing-along classic.
Chicken Payback (the bees) - Paul Butler and Jack White finish it off with a crazy version of Chicken Payback, getting everyone to do the animal noises, except Brandon Flowers who thinks the song is a waste of time. He heads backstage while the rest of the band finish things off.
So there you have it. Quite a thrilling tour it will be.
Yeah, i'm trying to avoid studying right now."see the monkey, do the monkey, pay the monkey back" - the Bees, "the Chicken Payback".